omfg. Barney D: BARNEY BURNT HIS PLAY BOOK FOR HER.
"Step 10: prove your loyalty to Patrice by burning the playbook. And actually burning it. Because you don't need it anymore."

DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING SERIOUS THAT IS!? Barney burning his play book is like me quitting off meat forever.

ONLY FOR LOVE.

EVERYBODY, MOVE YOUR FEET AND FEEL UNITED. WOAAAHHHHH.

I recently found this recipe on Blogilates.combecause I was feeling healthy. My jeans aren't AS tight anymore, so I suppose it's a step :> I gained 2kg, I lost 2kg HEHEHE okay won't get too cocky now cos everytime I do, I gain back everything dafuq.

Anyway, it's a REALLY REALLY easy recipe. And if I can do it, I - miss butterfingers, THEN YOU CAN TOO! *motivator moment*

It's a BANANA PANCAKE RECIPE! I'm inserting the screen-shot of the page now, cos I'm sure some of you are too lazy / have slow Internet to open yet another tab.

Click to enlarge

All you need is a banana and two eggs! THAT'S IT! Oh, and a bit of butter cos..I dunno about you, but I don't have PAM, EVO, or coconut oil lying around the kitchen. So I just used butter and a hot pan.

It's not exactly a pancake. More like a banana-filled omelette. BUT IT TASTES GREAT! I swear, you don't even need syrup - it tastes that good alone. I just made a batch for school tomorrow..hopefully they taste the same after a microwave trip..

My tip for you? Use ripe bananas. I kid you not. It was quite hard to mash those barely-ripe bananas. Cos they were kinda hard (THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID HAHA - sorry. I had to.)... so use ripe bananas to make your life easier. That is, if you're making it.

What's even better is that the entire recipe is about 250 calories! 
Do you know how much calories your typical Nasi Lemak contains? 500-600 CALORIES.
And I'm like, 5'1 so I really have to watch what I eat if I don't wanna get obese or something. 

And I don't. 

Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful faceDo You Realize - we're floating in space Do You Realize - that happiness makes you cry
Do You Realize - that everyone you know someday will die 

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know
You realize that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

My Mom has a good job where she is able to travel :) she went to Hawaii this time and got lots of stuff!

I now have 2 pair of jeans that are way too big for me. I told her to get me size 4 cos I am size 4. But when I tried them on, they feel like their 2 sizes too big. The Levi's are a Bold Curve....I forgot to tell her to get Demi-Curve, cos Bold Curve are for people with ACTUALY, GENUINE curves. Like, as in people like Kim Kardashian.
And the Gap jeans are super comfy but also super loose. The waist area sags. I feel like those wannabe ghetto guys at school

At least the shirts fit fine :) I finally got my first Ralph Lauren polo shirt hehehehehehehe.
And she also got me this Gap knit moto jacket, WHICH I LOVE. It's so pretty! And finally, a jacket that doesn't make my arms look like they're inflated sausages tied by a string to my shoulders.




And to those assholes who think I'm bragging right now,

I do not brag.
Okay, maybe sometimes. But usually it's because I feel that people around me brag also, and I might as well join in :P
It's the same with me being mean. Sometimes, certain people have to be brought down a peg or two.

That age is best which is the first,
When youth and blood are warmer;
But being spent, the worse, and worst
Times still succeed the former.                    - To the virgins, to make much of time.

Carpe diem is Latin for seize the day.
The poem-writer person, is telling virgins to quickly get married before it's too late. Because he thinks that youth is the best time of life, and the time after isn't that great. He stresses that virgins should get married in their prime, before it's too late and it'll be a challenge to get hitched.

Ng Su Jean, I know why that AC/DC song is in your iTunes. I played my songs in your laptop, remember? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA SO MUCH FOR THAT MOTHER THERESA THEORY.

I am getting sick and tired of all these comments that people make about me acting perverted to get guys' attention or just generally being an attention whore.

Honestly, that's just some bull shit. I do not act pervy to get attention. I am still a virgin, thankyouverymuch. 

And I can take a joke, really I can. But when you repeatedly, and very stubbornly joke about me not being a virgin and being a rapist, I will claw your brains out from your eye sockets. You do not fuck with me in this kind of matter. It is rude, it is obnoxious and really, it hurts a little on the inside that you would stubbornly think such a thing.

How would you like it if I tell the whole world you're a skank because you wear brightly patterned, lacy underwear? You wouldn't really like it, because now your rep is tarnished.

Yes, I admit my hormonal obsessions with half-naked guys. I'm quite sure it'll pass and I'm working on it. I'm not as crazy as I was two years ago. I still spazz about them, but in a more toned down way than I acted last time.

Rest assured, I do NOT go around sucking people's dicks. I do NOT. I do NOT involve myself in any sexual activity nor do I desire it. I do not have sexual fantasies of giving someone a blow job. I am still a virgin mentally, and physically.

Sometimes I joke about it, sure. But it's called a joke for a reason. BECAUSE IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE, AND BECAUSE IT AIN'T FUCKING REAL. So shut your trap about me being some sort of rapist on rampage. Because it's embarrassing, it's humiliating and it's just downright rude and unethical.

I may seem like a lay-back person to you, but I do have my own set of ethics and morale. I do not push people with my mean-ness, I do not cross the line. I know when to stop, okay? Sometimes I do it because I feel that the person has more potential, and therefore I give a little mean insult so they'll prove me wrong, okay.

I fucking hate it when people just going all "yeah, yeah yeah," and dismissing me when I'm obviously trying to prove myself right. I get extremely irritated, and you can see it clearly on my face if I am annoyed at you. I do not do anything to you, but inside.

INSIDE.
I WANT TO FUCKING GLUE YOU TO THE WALL AND STAPLE YOUR NIPPLES TOGETHER UNTIL I DRILL MY POINT INTO YOUR BRAIN.

I had a really scary nightmare the other day. It was sort of a continuation of a previous dream.

Okay, me and some other people that I cannot remember (I think one of my teachers, Pn Lee was in it) were trapped in this haunted mansion. I remember this little boy in the starting who couldn't handle the monster/ghost/poltergeist anymore and he got really pissed off and went to face it alone. He went outside, where this pool was (think the set of "Takin' Back My Love" by Enrique and Ciara. Totally the same) and he didn't come back. I think we heard lots of screaming, then he just didn't come back.

Some shit happened that I can't remember and we ended up in this room. They had a theory that the unknown being that was causing this distress had a weakness - bright coloured pants (dafuq right.)
And so, for some strange reason, I was told to sacrifice myself and wear those pants. I remember backing down. Then this sort of surge of bravery hit me and I put on those pants and went alone into the hall. The very dark hall. Sort of this really dark place with no lights, but for some reason you just know how it looked like.

Then I woke up. In the middle of the night.

I have two theories for this:
1. because I have my little snacks before bed. And according to recent studies, these night snacks will affect my overall sleeping condition; or
2. ghosts are staring at me in the middle of the night, causing my body to have a reaction towards the paranormal activity surrounding me and subsequently waking me up.

GOD PLEASE BE THE FORMER. PLEASE.

My week has been pretty uneventful, in an eh way. Nothing much ever happens to me. This BaZi-fortune teller-psychic-person-orsomethinglikethat predicts that I might be involved in an accident this year. A small part of me can't wait lol I always wanted to be one of those patients in the hospital. Fingers crossed that if that really happened, my doctor will be good looking :P

There are different standards of good looking people. Your location, in my opinion, is a contributing factor to your hotness level. Like, for example: you're at the market. Not the hypermarket, the market. As in the place  aunties gather to buy their weekly groceries. Guys there just skyrocket in the hotness level, because really, HOW MANY hot guys do you find at the market? Look at those fish mongers or butchers. God their sons all have really impressive forearms. But if you put them at somewhere, say KLCC, their hotness level just plunges.

So it really depends. Obviously I don't expect the hospital I go in to be like the set of Grey's Anatomy. I have some sense of realism in me. I'm not one of those girly girls you see everywhere that act like freaking Disney Princesses and have a naive mind like cough DebbieEuniceYongXin cough HAHA sorry guys, but you are pretty naive.

Love has always been a big part of my life. Back when I was like, 3 or 4 years old I used to force my parents to hold hands and they'll just awkwardly laugh cos my Dad has issues with PDA. He gets really embarrassed if you get too affectionate with him outside lol.

So this year's BM literature component is Konserto Terakhir - another drama.
Honestly, putting race aside, is this the best they can do? No matter, I am a fan of drama after all. The point of this post is to talk about how sad and fucked up Hilmi's life is.

Here's the main gist of it all.
Hilmi, some anak saudara of Datuk Johari showed up out of the blue and everyone's uncomfortable. Datuk Johari doesn't want to be reminded of his hometown and his wife is a superficial woman who's afraid Hilmi will embarrass them all because he's just some country boy. Hayati is just like meh.
So Hilmi fell in love with Hayati but they can't see each other because Datin Salamh (Datuk Johari's wife) doesn't like them together. Hilmi initially worked as a gardener for Datuk Johari, and this girl, Azizah who only cares about face value wasn't attracted to him. He suddenly becomes a hot-shot piano player and all of a sudden she's falling to his feet.
Hayati is engaged to Mohsin (some rich boy with a good and respectable family and a white collar job) so obviously Mohsin and Hilmi don't like each other.
Hayati ends up marrying Mohsin and Hilmi marries Azizah, eventhough they're all lying to themselves and they're obviously not extremely happy to be with each other. In the end, Hilmi dies the minute Datuk Johari pengsan or something like that.
And when everyone's in the hospital thinking about the injustice Hilmi has been treated with just because he doesn't have a complete education, it is revealed that Hilmi is Datuk Johari's son from his previous arranged marriage. Turns out Datuk Johari's brother married the woman to conceal the embarrassment of Datuk Johari's flee. He knocked up his wife, and ran away, unbeknownst to him that the woman got pregnant.

See how fucked up this is? My least favourite character is Datin Salmah. That bitch.
IF I EVER HAD A HILMI IN MY LIFE.. that would be kinda sad cos that means my Dad had a previous marriage and I fell in love with my half brother lol. No. That's gross.

I CANNOT FUCKING REMOVE THE WRITE PROTECT FROM MY USB.  Fuck you -.- ish. Gek sei yan.

Initially, I intended this rant to be on Facebook. I realised that it would have been too long, so here I am now.

Honestly, I do not give a shit if my school sends out their spies to spy on students outside the school walls. The school faculty is too insecure, apparently. Well, fuck you. Read this, tangkap me, delay my SPM results. I don't give a shit. This needs to be said, and I am going to say it. SMK Seri Mutiara of Taman Taynton View is a fucking ridiculous school with stupid rules.

Does any other school update their rule book every year? If yours does, well your school sucks too then. They're out to get us, I tell you. They're out to get us.

If you are contemplating transferring to my school, well kiss your worries goodbye. Sign yourself up to another school. I mean it.

Guess what they're doing now. Guess what the disciplinarians of my fucking ridiculous school is doing now. The prefects have to now come earlier with their long-ass rulers and measure your pinafore lengths. It has to be 10cm below the knee.

Notice how stupid this sounds already. First of all, where exactly IS the knee? Where do you start? WOULDN'T IT MAKE EVERYONE'S LIFE EASIER IF YOU JUST SAY BELOW THE KNEE?!? Who the fuck cares anyways? This means girls with long legs have to wear pinafores 5 times bigger just so it can go 10cm below the "knee".

I'm just getting started here.
And apparently, now we cannot have coloured lines on our shoes.
Uh, WHAT THE FUCK?!??!?! Oh my God these people live under rocks. Who made these rules? WHO MADE THESE RULES???
Apparently, school shoes have to be pure white. HAH. HAHA. I LAUGH AT YOUR RIDICULOUSNESS. Next thing you'll know they'll be giving us warnings. Fuck you, man. Fuck you.

YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M JUST GOING TO SAY IT.
PN YEAN NEEDS A FUCKING LIFE. SOMEONE NEEDS TO GET THIS DONATION BOX DEDICATED TO HER HAPPINESS, BECAUSE THIS LADY NEEDS SOME. SHE IS OBVIOUSLY IN DESPERATE NEED OF SOME SENSE AND COMPASSION. MAYBE HER HUSBAND IS AN ABUSER. EXCUSE ME, CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GO CHECK IF HER LIFE IS OKAY. BECAUSE ADULTS WITH NON-OK LIVES USUALLY CAUSE PEOPLE AROUND THEM TO HAVE SHITTY LIVES TO MAKE THEMSELVES FEEL BETTER. IT'S SICK, BUT TRUE.

I also do not like you, Pn Chin. You freaking orange haired auntie. You need to learn how to talk, you need to learn some manners. You need to fucking learn that students are not your underlings and slaves. We're kids who are forced to come to school to get some education, so some respect will be nice. I'm not asking you teachers to serve us food on silver platters. But a fucking response to our greetings will be nice. Not just a simple nod of acknowledgement you turds, it would be encouraging to us all if you guys SMILED and said GOOD MORNING like Pn Tan or Pn Chen. HELLO. DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT NOTICE HOW EVERYONE LIKES PN CHEN.

Oh, Pn Roslina. Wherefore art thou? I MISS YOUR NICENESS.

As for the rest of you guys,

In response to Su Jean's blog post, I shall talk about my tuition experiences.

Can you position yourself in the shoes of another? Can you relive what they had gone through? Can you say you know it all when you don't? You can try, but you can't really succeed.

Do you see people lie to your face? Do you see people trying to tip toe around you so they don't have to lie and face your feelings? You do. Admit it, it happened to you at some point of life. But you don't really do anything. You don't confront them about it, you don't talk to anyone about it. You just let it stay in your mind, accumulating by the days. And when they get caught, a small part of you smiles.

Do people get mad at you for no good reason you can think of? Do you have a pound of chocolate in the back of your closet for sad occasions? Do you cry yourself to sleep at night because you don't know what you did wrong? Did you ever feel pressured to the point where you wouldn't care if someone pointed a gun to your temple?

Do you have moments when you just sit down and look around you and realise you don't know who's fake or who's real? Do you sometimes doubt your friends, your family, your teachers, everyone around you? Do you feel like your life is a huge music video of fucked up moments, where the happy moments are hidden under rocks and the nightmares come out like ghosts to haunt you wherever you went.

Have you ever gotten the first A in the subject you never thought you could? Have you ever had pride bubble inside of you when teachers smile at you in approval? Have you ever felt unexplainable feelings when you make your parents proud of you? Do you feel relief when your parents let you go out with your friends, and agree to drive you there?

Have you ever had a really good laugh, and end up having a stomach ache? Have you ever experienced pain, but in a good way? Have you ever had butterflies erupt in your stomach, and your heart starts beating really fast when your crush looks your way and smiles? Have you ever felt the happiness of approval by your peers?

Have you ever woke up 5 minutes late, but the day just gets better? Have you ever looked at the sky and think about the possibilities of life? Have you ever saw miracles happen when you think you're down? Have you ever rolled around all night, but it's all good because you only thought of happy things. Have you ever smiled at random texts people send over to you, because it means someone is thinking about you. Have you ever had superstitious moments when your eyelashes fall and it means someone misses you?

Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and for once, everything is just alright?

My dreams are often weird. I found a common factor they all have. I always end up in a place that externally, is one place, internally is another. Is this some sort of sign or lesson that I'm supposed to learn from? Is this some sort of insight to the future that awaits me??




Uh, excuse me.

Blogging via iPad now, so it won't be long. I am an impatient person and impatient people pay no heed to waiting.

Am currently doing my math tuition homework. Bases. Bases, bases, bases. What the fuck are you actually about? I read the text book. First sentence fucks up my brain so I just stopped. 


My mind is currently exploding with questions. Why is it that base 2 numbers can only be written by digits 0 and 1? What happened to the rest of the numbers?? Not good enough for base 2? Or is it because 0 and 1 is smaller than the number 2? 
Huh. Makes sense.


And why can't we convert base10 to base5 on the calculator?? WHY IS MATH SO BIAS?? 

But I still like the subject, however hard it is for me to achieve an A. I'm weird like that.

First day of school was the biggest headache I've got this year. Which isn't saying that much as the first day of school falls on the second day of the new year. Which is the stupidest thing ever created by mankind. Fuck you all education authorities.