just ordered this online. I hope I don't get buyer's remorse.


Sigh. I know, I know. But CNY is coming up and my Mom keeps pestering me to get a dress. Sigh. Might as well get something with a cut I like right. Always liked those old fashioned dresses that Audrey Hepburn used to wear *hearts in eyes* they're so classy and timeless.

I HATE IT WHEN I FIND A DRESS I LIKE AND IT TURNS OUT TO BE FUCKING BACKLESS LIKE FUCK YOU GUYS MAKE SOMETHING DECENT CAN AH. Not everyone wants to wear a dress to go to late night parties k. Not everyone is comfortable with walking around in malls with their backs exposed -_-

I swear I never ate dinner so early with my parents before, at 5pm. Everytime I suggest we eat dinner that early they complain it's too early blablabla but this time they complied cos my brother gets off work at 4pm so we ate at Midvalley, again.

This time we went to this place called Delicious, just opposite of Starbucks. CAN I JUST SAY, I LOVE THEIR DECOR. It's nothing spectacular but I like how they use blues and white. It's so pretty. Or it could be the period talking lol.

I had this thing called Napoleon (something that sounds like that I forgot lol cos it wasn't an actual word) Spaghettini. It was okay, not fantastic omgwhatisthispieceofheaven but not omfggetthisfuckingawayfromme disgusting. Personally, I prefer Italiannies' spaghetti heh. Don't be deceived by the plate size btw the portion was so big

My parents shared this chicken chop. Personally, I don't know whether I don't like chicken chops or this one just isn't good lol it was bearable but definitely not worth it's price at RM2x.xx haha like my home-cooked chicken chops taste better. Or maybe my home-cooked ones are really good hehehehehehe chehchehcheh

This weirdass thing is a pavlova. I just googled and apparently it's supposed to be surrounded by meringue lol it's basically strawberries with chocolate flakes sitting on this island of cream surrounded by a fortress of meringue. Bleh, I don't like it. It's not filling, if that's what you're looking for. Definitely not a savoury dessert, more like something you might eat with a cup of sugarless coffee.

Delicious isn't bad. But I think people go there for their high tea or something lol not dinner or lunch cos their cakes look really good. I wanted to try a banoffee pie but no one wanted it cos no one heard of banoffee before -_-

Submitted my application form to UTAR today. I'm feeling so doubtful cos the lecturers there seem so...incapable of starting a conversation. I hope they're good, or at least not like Pn Maznin or something la please I can't handle another language barrier.

And why is it that majority of the applicants are guys?! And why do the girls look so...nerdy. OKAY LA, MAYBE THEY'RE COOL AND ALL but I mean c'mon there's always the blonde of the classroom. Also noticed that architecture course is probably filled with guys and 5% girls.

My Mom said that's good cos that means concentrated male attention HAHAHAHA she said she always liked a majority of guys over girls anyway cos girls are normally dumber. Less sensible than guys anyway. Which is quite true BUT C'MON I NEED MY OWN KIND RIGHT. If I hang out with guys all day I'll turn into a guy myself.......

The English lecturer in the foundations desk is really pretty tho! But I suspect she's the one way and one way only type. Sigh. Can never escape these kind of people..

OH and turns out my Dad's friend is an Engineer lecturer at UTAR wtf (I'm looking at you Siew Gee) thank God I didn't apply for engineering lol it'll be so awkward NOT TO MENTION HE MIGHT RAT ME OUT TO MY DAD not to say that I'm a bad student. *coooooooooooooooooooough*

I hope I make the right kind of friends. I know me. I'M SO EASILY INFLUENCED. I DON'T WANNA BECOME A POT ADDICT CLUBBER. Sigh. Architecture students should be okay right. right. right.

Also, contemplating marketing. If I can get that scholarship to get into MMU I'm gonna study marketing and test the waters there. See if the grass really is greener on the other side.

Some people at school say I'm some spoiled brat who doesn't know how to sweep the floor and wash the dishes just because I have a maid.


EXCUUUUUUUUUUSE ME. Being the only girl (besides my Mom) in the house, that means I'm the only person who does the dishes on my maid's off day. I ALSO KNOW HOW TO SWEEP THE FLOOR LA PLEASE I came from a Chinese school. It's suicide for your fingers if you say you don't know how to sweep the floor.

Then once Fiona said I probably never bought my own stationery before.
with my kind of stationery addiction, I'll obviously have to pay for my own stationery. Been that way since Form 2! MY BROTHERS ALWAYS HAD MY MOM TO BUY FOR THEM OKAYYYY!

Spaghetti noodles, mashed potatoes and the sauce.

 Don't tell me the mashed potatoes look weird I know they do BUT IT TASTES FINE.
Everyone just kept asking me why I didn't put salt lol uh excuse me you high-blood pressure family members of my mine, try eating stuff without too much sodium please. I only used a tablespoon worth of butter, a pinch of salt and some garlic flakes for four potatoes lololol

closeup on my mashed potatoes

IT'S CHRISTMAS. WHICH MEANS YESTERDAY WAS CHRISTMAS EVE!

Mojo Chicken

 This was okay, not spectacularly good but it wasn't horrible. At least it's chicken breast, which I like. You weird chicken foodies can throw tomatoes at me for all I care I like chicken breast even if everyone else in the world doesn't like it cos the meat tastes bad or something about the texture.

If you've been raised on pathetic skinny kampung chickens you will ravish anything that's fat and bone-less.

Beef Ribs

 Normally I wouldn't like ribs cos their so messy but this was okay! Better than the one we had at TGIFriday's. It wasn't tough or anything and the meat slid off the bone! To be honest I had more problems eating the broccoli than the meat lol the broccoli was so soft it kept sliding off my fork so frustrating like LET.ME.EAT.YOU.

New York Strip

It's been so long since I've blogged here or maybe I haven't I dunno I feel like I only blog when I'm pissed or when I'm super excited.

Okay, while I'm in a relatively positive mood.

I'm going to UTAR for Foundation in Arts then moving on to Degree in Architecture (Part 1)

After part 1, will go find job in good company (or any company in that matter lol.)

If I get enough (and the right kind!) experience, I'll go apply for Part 2.

If I get touched by God's finger in the aspects of luck, creativity and inspiration, I will go further and take the Part 3 test!

DON'T TELL ME NEGATIVE COMMENTS OR GIVE ME THAT "oh, really....." LOOK. I'm feeling positive.

Cos apparently in Architecture its all "hands on" and "experience oriented" and stuff. And it's not a lot of rote learning, but a lot of experience and problem solving work. I BELIEVE I CAN. If I don't, there's always drugs HAHA just kidding.

I'm not serious with the drugs, don't worry.

this is Kenshin's master, Hiko Seijuro AKA THE MOST FLIPPING BEAUTIFUL 43 YEAR OLD SENSEI EVER TO LIVE IN THE ANIME WORLD. I think.

Yesterday, my Mom leaned her head on my shoulder. Immediately, I sensed something was wrong (or maybe I've been watching so much Samurai X, I've become delirious LOL. My internal monologues all sound like an epic battle now.) 

I swear my dog knows of the power she holds inside those two soul suckers of hers. Just one whine from her and we all go jelly =_= she knows, I tell you. 

I've been watching Samurai X again. I am aware it's flipping old BUT IT'S SO GOOD. It's my Avatar substitute for the moment being. Still waiting for Korra Book 3 to come out. BACK TO THE TOPIC. Kaoru should seriously open her eyes and see how freaking cool Kenshin is in his Battousai mode. I get the whole "oh, Kenshin, you musn't lose yourself like this" thing but seriously. Dude. He's so cool in his killer mode I can't handle it.
|

Sigh.

1. Why is it so hard to find a decent pair of combat boots in a decent height that doesn't cost an arm and a leg. I hope Steve Madden suddenly has a 90% sale 
2. Why is it so hard to find a pair of ballet flats THAT ISN'T A SLIP ON.
3. Why does Forever 21 charge those fantastic sweaters RM95? Aren't their sales target ages 16-21?! WHAT TEEN CAN AFFORD A RM95 SWEATER?! Ridiculous.
   
4. Whenever I go to the fitting rooms of stores, I feel a little suspicious. They probably use flattering lighting and hang their mirrors at an angle so the customers will be tricked into thinking they look amazing but when they go out to natural light they "suddenly" look fat -.-
5. Why is it that the only place to find cheap clothes is at places like Times Square or Sungai Wang? I hate going there. It's over-populated with rapists and la-la mui/zais. The traffic is horrendous. The shopkeepers are bitchy. 
   
6. Why is it that places like Gap and H&M are considered "budget outlets" at US but they're like freaking high fashion in Malaysia? CLEARLY THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG HERE. Malaysian designers are either too kampung or too expensive. 

In case you haven't heard cos you're lame, I WENT SHOPPING TODAY! Like, finally. I haven't gone shopping in a little more than a month!

1. H&M has a sale now. It's either a Christmas sale or a Year End sale. I got a back v-neck sweater and a pair of olive skinny pants (nope, not denim) for RM39 each!  The pants retail at RM80! STEAL. 
   
2. After the fantastic buy, my Mom decided to have lunch (or rather, tea?) at The Loaf. I had a raisin cinnamon bun and iced latte. Then I gave in and ate a gingerbread man cos it's the Christmas season gingerbread men are like, compulsory. 
3. As if my day wasn't fantastic already, guess what I found at KLCC.
   
   TYPO. THE LAND OF MY DREAMS. OPENED A BRANCH AT KLCC. SOMEONE. HOLD ME. I couldn't even digest the rush of excitement and giddiness through my body at that moment like omfg typo. So I got myself a 2014 spinout planner :) 
   
   it was RM30 but whatever. I need to treat myself man!

1. Whenever the answers of multiple choice questions are in a D-C-D sequence, my mind sings "doe-see-doe" please tell me this happens to you too.
2. Whenever I assign people with jobs and they tell me some lameass excuse because they're lazy to do it. 
   
   I do not tolerate laziness. Especially not in a group assignment cos bitch you are doing your part for the motherfucking assignment.
3. I need to work out like Terengganu is not for people with slow metabolic rates. 
4. My brother uses his iPod to listen (not watch!) Family Guy while playing PSP before he sleeps. He falls asleep all the time with his iPod still playing. He also always falls asleep on the couch while watching TV.
   He turns off the lights when I'm doing my fucking work and tells me its to "save electricity". 

   
5. I don't hate my brother if that's what you think. It's just that I can't believe someone so dumb exists in my house, considering my Dad's low tolerance rate for stupidity. 
6. My not-so-newly-found-love for brown skin tanned guys resurfaced itself and now the only thing I can think of are tanned guys. None of the pasty Korean guys (Kang Ha Neul, though) but then some people don't look so good tanned. WHATEVER. ITS JUST EYE CANDY. 
   

My mother has reached that age where she becomes completely deaf to what she actually says compared to what she thinks she's saying -.- and she's becoming really unreasonable and her mood swings. Gah.

So my grandmother passed away on 11.12.13

Before you judge me for not being depressed (like some people. When you're depressed they complain you're a wet blanket. When you're happy they complain you're a happy-go-lucky-person-with-no-stress-at-all.) my grandmother was 86 years old. And she was already waiting for it.



Go on, burn me on a stake for saying that. IT'S FLIPPING TRUE WHETHER IT SOUNDS HEARTLESS OR NOT. According to my aunt, she was pondering about it one day lol and she started telling her about the specifications of the funeral.

Apparently she was sick of staying in the hospital that she pulled out her IV. But she died peacefully, in her sleep. So that's good.

My grandmother for her age has the best skin I've ever seen on an 86 year old. There's barely any spots on her face! And the makeup auntie person made her look really nice :)

Feeling very conflicted with the undertaker lol like why is there a cameraman during the funeral and why is it uploaded on Facebook like ._. I don't really mind that much but isn't it kinda disrespectful or something to market a funeral service...



When we were chanting the Buddhism thing or whatever you call it, my cousin did it so loud in the most chickenish voice a human can manage CAN YOU IMAGINE THE AMOUNT OF WILL POWER IT TOOK ME NOT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD. And then halfway through I suddenly had to sneeze, and I knew it wasn't the feminine sniffle (like that ever happened to me. I'm starting to think I have an unhealthy amount of testosterone in me) so I was like dontsneezedontsneezedontsneezedontsneeze and I didn't. But I missed a few lines of the chant, so whoops hehe.

Went to the edu fair at Midvalley today. There were so many people -.- and those aunties -.- and the people who signed up IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PATHWAY.


Dah tau the place is filled with people and you still register in the middle of the road omg I felt like yelling at them. Partially cos they're so inconsiderate and dumb, partially cos I was in a bad mood. My emotions run wild when there's a crowd. I was not made to handle crowds with a stable state of emotion.

And all those people who obviously never researched about further studies before. Didn't anyone at least went online and searched for info AND THEN PLAN WHAT TO ASK AT THE FAIR TO SAVE TIME!? Malaysians certainly are not planners, that I can say.


Factor out the crowd, I felt that the RENG college woman was the most helpful. But she's a marketer so naturally she's good at talking lol I like her. I remember her too, she came to our school exhibition once and she talked to me about choosing the right path. She looks like she came out of a Pixar movie lol. No, she doesn't look kind, she's more of the Mary Poppins kind of person lol.

The UTAR guy was helpful too, I guess. He impressed my Dad by saying you need the right kind of job experience so it'll be easier to get the Ar. title. But when I spoke about Part 1 and Part 2 everyone went blank. Frustrating, I know. And the fact that most of them have twinning programs with overseas colleges lol.


I went online and people were talking about how hard it is, how a lot of people quit and I'm like gargh.

But then again it depends on interest. BUT DO I HAVE INTEREST IN THIS :< sighsighsigh.

Was at The Gardens today and my Mom got distracted by the Dr Brandt booth so naturally she stopped. And naturally like all big name cosmetic promoter, that guy named John talked a lot. No, he wasn't gay if you were wondering. Or if he is he's the Blaine kind of gay. The oh, you're gay? kind of gay. OKAY MOVING ON 

1. Unlike most course admissions, if you want to get into an accredited architecture school, you'll have to pass a series of interviews and tests. You know what they ask? Your favourite architectural masterpiece, your favourite architect, who designed what, and types of architectural styles.
2. After you pass that you have to pass the impromptu art test. They give you a theme and you draw it out for them. If they like it, you get into the third round. If they don't, take a hike.
3. Pass all two rounds? YOU'RE UP FOR THE INTERVIEW. They ask you what they asked in the first test but in detail. Apparently it's a confidence test.
4. Accredited architecture schools are mostly public universities. Do you know how hard it is to get into public universities if you're not Bumiputera? Sure they say there are non-bumis now BUT HOW MUCH ACTUALLY GET IN? Please, don't make me laugh. I don't see non-bumis in their website. And if there is, that's probably the only non-bumi they have lol. 
5. Get into the college and battle the courses. Your creativity is tested every week. Lots of people quit. I can't afford to quit.
6. Private universities only offer Part 1. I want to get Part 2 too dammit. If you want part 2, you'll have to go overseas. 
7. Whenever people come, I'll have to tame my dog. I feed my dog in the weekdays. I basically monitor the dog during weekdays. And my brother says no one helps when it comes to the dog.
   
8. I don't think I'm going to the edu fair.
9. I'm still not sure about architecture. Whenever I talk about it, my family gives me that "...oh." look. 
   
10. Don't talk to me about passion. My passion? To be able to afford the material things I want. Because I am not a tumblr girl, I do not engulf myself in "deep feels", I do not lust after enlightenment every moment of the day, I do not think about how I can change the world for the better. I think about shoes, pens, clothes, food all.day.long. Call my superficial, whatever. I already know I am.
    
11. I want to go to edu fair, but at the same time I don't want to. I think a big part of wanting to go is because my parents don't seem to be concerned at all whether or not I go to college. The only thing that interests them right now are their own kidneys and livers. 
12. I want to go to the Big Bad Wolf Sale. But my gustoness is slowly dying away cos no one is supporting me. 
    
13. Happy songs make me cry, sad songs calms me down. Something is clearly wrong here.
14. Everyone is making everything so simple, and I'm here getting frustrated because IT ISN'T. At the same time I wonder if I'm making everything more complicated than it really is, and maybe I'm turning into my brother. That scares me, it makes me pissed because if there's one thing I don't want to be, it's my brother. I don't care if old people prefer him more and his morals are probably more mature that your average 23 year old. I don't want to have to be friendless everyday. I don't want to sacrifice social life for what he calls What Everyone Should Have which is a very very sad life. My brother isn't any happier but he says what he's living is what everyone should do - isolate themselves from their friends and being whole. He can go fuck himself. He can bring his stupid ideologies and stuff them up his asshole. Because under no circumstances am I becoming my brother. 
15. I can't talk about these things with people. Cos no one can relate that much. That's okay, I understand. But at the same time I'm sick and tired of people telling me to fucking calm down COS I WILL NOT FUCKING CALM DOWN. I am sick of people giving me unrealistic options. I am sick of people spreading rumours about me. I do not want Form 1 to happen again. 
     
16. No matter how much people tell me they're "sorry", no I will not forget about Form 1. Don't talk bullshit and tell me you weren't on the "omg why is ezhen so annoying" bandwagon. If you weren't, YOU WOULD'VE FUCKING TALKED TO ME THEN. Jacinta told me to live my life as if tomorrow I'm going to die. I don't do positive things, IF I WERE TO DIE TOMORROW I'LL MAKE SURE I TELL EVERYONE WHAT I REALLY THINK ABOUT THEM. But I still need to live in this world so I'm keeping myself shut lol.
17. Don't you feel like you've been molding yourself into what your friends want to see that you're slowly losing yourself away and suddenly you don't know who you are and what you want in life anymore? Do you ever have quiet moments to yourself and suddenly realise these moments are just a harsh reminder of how different you are from your friends, and if they find out this darker side of you they won't want to be friends with you ever again? 
    
18. Don't you ever feel like how everyone is simply not helping? But at the same time you know they are. You know your friends care. You know your parents care. But you don't feel it. You don't feel the care-ness. 
19. to my conflicting personality: go fuck yourself. 
    

Watched Top That! again and this week's "episode" (? what do you call it? Segment? idk who cares.) was a bit inspirational

Tyler and Becca talked about Noah who was embarrassed of his glasses. CAN I JUST SAY, how adorable Noah is like asdfghjkl he looks so cute in his glasses and his laugh is the funniest thing ever, next to Verinia's gasping-for-breath laugh


My first pair of specs weren't embarrassing for me. Okay, maybe it was. Funny thing was, I was only self-conscious about it in the van, when I reached school it was like "yeah, I have specs. Problem?" and people kept telling me it was cool and shit cos they thought I was really embarrassed LOL. Even my first boy crush like

GAH okay delete delete delete. I don't want to remember my boy crush days they were horrible gaehnsvcdfghnvhj

Moving on,
Becca also talked about this Bullying Experiment these guys did. One guy in obvious bully clothes started bullying the other guy in obvious nerd clothes around public areas to see if anyone will step out and help.



1. Now that you're aware that yes, THESE EXPERIMENTS WILL HAPPEN EVENTUALLY, just do the right thing and stop them. Okay, so you're a girl. WHO THE FUCK CARES. What are they gonna do? RAPE YOU IN DAYLIGHT? Please.

2. If you don't do it, your face goes on Youtube and let me tell you, Youtube comments hold nothing back. You'll probably instigate a very heated argument of bullying that'll eventually (don't lie, we know this will happen) spiral into a huge racial discussion.

I saw some of the comments, and they said no one helped cos their acting was so fake. Um, I don't know about you but that sounds like your guilt speaking.


And of course, because this week is a Paul Walker week (Nelson Mandela will be this weekend until next week.)

Apparently, this jewelry store talks about how Paul Walker paid for this military couple's engagement ring when he overheard them saying how they weren't able to afford it.


Gah. Them feels.